Looking Forward To It

Isn't it high time someone came out and said it? It's all over. Forget it. For years there was "outsourcing" and talk of "globalization" and everything was going to be great.

Originally it blindsided me when I realized things weren't really going to be great, but I've seen the actual truth for quite awhile now. There will be an Army of Unemployed Americans taking over core sections of major cities all through the United States, aided by the Army of Zombies. And let's not forget the illegal immigrants. Why do you think they keep making all of these zombie movies? It's not because they're good, it's to acclimate us. To the inevitable.

I thought the saying was "accident waiting to happen," but this guy is actually going further than that. A "train wreck" is pretty bad. There are lots of minor accidents that you might not even notice. This particular "fiscal train wreck" is probably going to involve trains...carrying toxic chemicals as well, which will add an eco-disaster layer to the awful cake of worms that will be the only thing left for the few of us that will still be gainfully employed. I will hack my way to and from work lugging a 20 pound machine gun and blowtorch. I'll be sweating inside my astronaut's suit which will be the only thing keeping me from being swallowed up by the virus of the living dead, the toxic chemicals, and the second hand smoke that is hurting babies and knocking down so many people outside of office buildings these days. And there will probably be even more second hand smoke because some people will take up smoking as a way to cope with the pressure. It will also look cool and people will not be as hung up on their health because they will constantly be reminded that their lives can be snuffed out at any second. Expected lifespans will plunge, along with...expectations.

Just re-thinking this a little as I re-read it, this semi-post-apocalyptic lifestyle might actually turn out to be pretty great, assuming there will be women who can survive in this environment wearing some kind of bikini that would enable them to fly and elude the zombies and the unemployed.

The U.S. economy is a "fiscal train wreck" waiting to happen that risks ushering in a period of stagflation featuring minimal growth, high unemployment and deflationary pressure, U.S. economist Nouriel Roubini wrote on Friday.

[Reuters via Yahoo! Finance]