Wednesday, March 2, 2011

SPECIAL REPORT - Zombie Takeover Begins With Conquest Of The Ant Kingdom!

Here we go. Brain controlling fungi turning ants into zombies. Do I need to tell you where this is heading? We are going to be run by fungus among us!

Ants are really intelligent and super strong. An ant can lift 50 times its weight. These things can practically turn over a car. And as a group, forget about it, they form bridges and build right over the corpses of their bestest buddies to get things done if they have to. Brilliant AND ruthless.

So if this zombie thing can beat the ants, we humans don't have a chance. Get a look at the mug on this red ant. Come on. They are tougher than any human, even Vin Diesel or DeNiro. These zombie ants will be eaten by birds, and then they will start talking about "bird flu" again but don't be fooled, that's when the birds start getting eaten, finally by chickens and turkeys where they will easily be consumed by fish and humans. Then it's all over, because a whole wave of zombie animals will already be in place by the time the first humans get it.

If you run, the chickens will get you. If you swim, the fish will gnaw you to pieces. If you fall, there are the ants who started this whole freakin' thing.

But no matter how you feel about ants, this sounds bad. Why doesn't anyone listen to me? Why?!?
Scientists have identified four new species of brain-controlling fungi that turn ants into zombies that do the parasite's bidding before it kills them.

Identified from samples collected at two sites in Brazil's tropical rain forest, each of the four species specializes in controlling a different species of carpenter ant.

The original zombie-ant fungus, Ophiocordyceps unilateralis, was first identified in 1865, and it seems to exist around the world.

"So we knew, right off the bat, there was a range of other species within that," said study researcher David Hughes, an entomologist at Pennsylvania State University. "I think it will turn out to be in the hundreds."

Once it infects an ant, the fungus uses as-yet-unidentified chemicals to control the ant's behavior, Hughes told LiveScience. It directs the ant to leave its colony (a very un-ant-like thing to do) and bite down on the underside of a leaf — the ant's soon-to-be resting place. Once it is killed by the fungus, the ant remains anchored in place, thanks to its death grip on the leaf.

Ultimately, the fungus produces a long stalk that protrudes from the ant's head, shooting spores out in the hopes of infecting other ants. Two of the four newly discovered species also sprouted smaller stalks elsewhere, including from the victim's feet and lower leg joints – the equivalent of knees.

[LiveScience.com]

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