Sunday, March 27, 2011

Royals Living Large As Ordinary People Remain Ordinary

A secret cake design? Sixteen different types of blooms and foliage? Can you say B-I-T-C-H? Come on. Getting married to this guy, never having to get off your royal ass again. And on top of it all, two cakes.

Maybe everybody should bake them a cake, or be REQUIRED to bake them a cake or you get your head chopped off. The good old days of royalty. You can try to make it nice but the British Empire is built on BLOOD and having heads put on sticks.

There's been a big boom in reality TV but there's not enough reality going on here at all. Everyone's nice-ing it up. Buying commemorative plates. Two cakes are better than one. Oh joy! If they want to make this wedding work they need a good hanging right before to get the crowd jazzed up. I'd like to see Kate Middleton whip a pickpocket. That's how we used to like it!
Royal wedding plans announced Sunday show an admirable spirit of compromise: The main cake will be a fruity, floral masterwork designed with input from Kate Middleton, but Prince William will get his childhood favorite chocolate biscuit cake too.

When it comes to the future king and queen, two cakes are better than one.

Palace officials said the royal couple have chosen a multi-tiered traditional fruit cake decorated with cream and white icing that will be created by designer Fiona Cairns, a cakemaker to the stars – such as former Beatle Paul McCartney – who has built a thriving business since starting to bake at her kitchen table 25 years ago.

The actual design remains a secret, but the cake will have a strong British floral theme, developed with extensive input from Middleton. The master baker will use the Lambeth Method, a popular English style that relies on intricate piping and scrollwork to create leaves, flowers and other decorative elements.

Middleton asked Cairns to represent about 16 different blooms and types of foliage on the cake, each with a different symbolic meaning, a practice that was popular in the Victorian era, palace officials said.

[Associated Press]

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