Whip It Good

If you're one of the millions of American children who has had his freedom to consume sickly-sweet, fruity, caffeinated malt-liqour taken away by jack-booted government thugs, don't despair. There's a new boozy product available that's sure to please the most childish of palettes.

Only weeks after cracking down on the booze-and-caffeine-fueled Four Loko party drink, regulators and public-health officials are now warily eyeing another liquor concoction they fear will appeal to young binge drinkers: alcohol-infused whipped cream.

Canisters of Cream — a 30-proof whipped cream that comes in a variety of flavors, including chocolate, raspberry, orange and cherry are now arriving on liquor-store shelves across the state.

"They can get a significant amount of alcohol in one shot," Dr. Anita Barry, a director at the Boston Public Health Department, said of drinkers who consume the boozy topping.

[...]

At the Wine Emporium on Tremont Street, Cream sells for $12.99, and it’s flying off the shelves, general manager Max Pendolari said.

"I’m amazed at the amount we’ve sold," he said. "I thought these would be one of those kitschy things we pulled off the shelf in six months, but within the first week we had already sold out the initial order."

Chris Guiher, chief executive of Kingfish Spirits of Cleveland, maker of Cream, said his company has complied with all laws and is determined to make sure it is distributed and marketed "responsibly."

One can only hope that the nitrous oxide in the can is also infused with booze so that inhaling "whip its" will be especially mind-blowing and dangerous.

[Boston Herald]