Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Lazy NY/NJ Idiots Mauled by Snowblowers

The Blizzard of 2010 has crippled more than just the transportation infrastructure of the tri-state area. It's also responsible for grinding up into chopped meat the hands of dozens of people too lazy to pick up a shovel.

A dozen North Jersey residents were treated for hand injuries Monday — one serious enough to require surgery — from trying to unclog snowblowers during the cleanup from the blizzard that dumped more than 2 feet of snow in some areas.

At Hackensack University Medical Center, eight patients were treated for hand injuries, including a man who partially amputated two of his fingers, said Dr. Joseph Feldman, chairman of the department of emergency medicine.

[...]

"I say to people, 'Would you put your hand in a blender or under a lawn mower?' " Feldman said. "If the answer is no, why would you put your hand in a snowblower?"

It isn't just New Jersey numb-skulls who are hacking themselves to pieces with these machines. Empire State morons are in on the action as well.

A team of plastic surgeons said Tuesday they've seen more than a dozen people across the region who have seriously hurt their limbs since Sunday's blizzard while trying to unclog snowblowers.

[...]

"Even when the machine is off and the machine is unplugged . . . when you put your hand into the machine you can still have damage done to your hand," said Dr. Thomas Davenport, head of microsurgery at Winthrop-University Hospital in Mineola.

That's what happened to Mario Gianfrancesco on Monday morning, when he nearly lost the tips of two of his fingers.

A snowblower operated by his brother jammed, and the Mineola resident tried to clear the blockage by putting his gloved hand in the propeller.

The blower grabbed the glove and partially amputated the middle and ring fingers of the 34-year-old carpenter's left hand at the first knuckle of both fingers.

Gianfrancesco said he was in "pure shock" when he realized what had happened to his hand.

"It was a freak accident," he said holding his bandaged hand.

Um, no, it wasn't a "freak accident"; it was an act of utter stupidity, jack-ass.

[NorthJersey.com] [Newsday]

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