America Continues Its Worldwide Leadership In Producing Morons

I love a good poll story. The first part...indicates that most Americans believe...that the fact that the country is going broke...is not very important. Then, when the interviewer cajoled them a little...and said..."come on, seriously, it is important"...half the people, after cajoling, said..."we can address it...but not too much."

As you get to the end...they talk about Obama...and they are critical of him...even though he just caved in on the whole tax thing and seems content to let us ride the national debt into eternity as the millionaires hold on to their cash.

This part...indicates that Obama believes...that the fact that the country is going broke...is not very important.

So the people dislike Obama...even though he seems to be following their lead and tries to do little or nothing to change the current setup. Poor guy just can't win!

Though reducing the deficit has been a central part of political rhetoric in recent weeks, only 25 percent of respondents said that they considered “the federal deficit and government spending” to be “the most important issue facing the country.” In addition, 51 percent of Americans said they feel that in addressing the deficit, it is more important to “minimize sacrifices for the American people,” and only 40 percent said the answer is “bold and fast change” that would tackle the issue head on.

Most of the proposed solutions for reducing the deficit were met with opposition from respondents, but 70 percent of Americans supported the idea of taxing Wall Street profits, 67 percent favored “means testing for Social Security and Medicare and reduce benefits for the wealthy,” and, weighing in on the issue of tax cuts for the wealthy, 59 percent of respondents were in favor of getting rid of tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans.

Americans overwhelmingly disapprove of President Obama’s handling of the budget deficit, which 60 percent voicing disapproval and only 31 percent approving of his policy. Respondents also rebuked Obama for his performance creating jobs, with 55 percent disapproving.

[Yahoo! News]

British Town Considers Stacking Bodies Before Incinerating Them

In these difficult times it's important to save every shilling. And with certain doom on the horizon, reducing greenhouse gas emissions from crematoriums is a moral obligation. So why not take a lesson from the Germans, masters of efficiency, and stack people like cordwood before shoving them into fiery ovens?

BEREAVEMENT bosses in Solihull have sparked an outcry after it was revealed they are exploring the possibility of “stacking” bodies before cremating them in order to save money.

As part of an efficiency review, the council is looking into saving costs by conducting several cremations simultaneously rather than immediately after each funeral serviced.

[...]

Coun Hogarth, who represents Silhill, said: “They are looking at ways of saving funds at the crematorium. Other councils have started not cremating the bodies straight away and they are looking at that.

“But I feel that it’s not very dignified to be doing that. I also understand that some ethnic communities, when the body has gone behind the curtains, like to go to the back room to see the final stage of the body going into the cremator.... You think it’s the final stage when the coffin goes behind the curtain. But there could be half a dozen held around the back. Councillor Craig didn’t like the word ‘stacking’, but if you’ve got a lot of coffins waiting to be cremated it’s like that, isn’t it?”

[...]

A report said: “It is accepted that cremation equipment is not always utilised in the most efficient way. This has resulted on some occasions in higher than anticipated operational and service-related costs. It is considered that by adopting a more logistical-based approached to the programming of cremations, a more efficient and effective service will be delivered that benefits the environment due to reduced carbon emissions and through the reduced use of gas and electricity.”

[Birmingham Mail]

Have Yourself a Deadly Little Christmas

Insulting your boss and making unwelcome advances toward coworkers aren't the only dangers of overindulging at workplace holiday festivities. You could also drop dead in the bathroom -- and nobody would bother to notice.

A BRITISH man collapsed and died in the bathroom of a restaurant where his office Christmas party was being held - but his body was not discovered until the following morning, the Yorkshire Post reported yesterday.

The 25-year-old man, who was not yet named, became sick Friday at Le Bistrot Pierre in Sheffield, northern England, and went to use the restroom, where he died.

His colleagues left the restaurant, not realizing the man was still in the building. His body was not discovered until restaurant manager Nick Dunkley went into the bathroom Saturday.

"His friends had gone home without him, and the poor chap was then found in our toilet by the manager, Nick. He was 25 years old, with a wife, and had apparently become ill and taken himself to the toilet," said one of the restaurant's owners, Robert Beacham. "We closed the restaurant on Saturday and Sunday out of respect."

[Herald Sun]

'Tis the Season to Lie and Scheme

It takes a special kind of father to use lies and deceit in order to get a few more toys for his precious daughter.

A CALLOUS dad faked a burglary at his home and claimed thieves had stolen his daughter’s Christmas presents in a shameful bid to get more gifts.

[...]

[Tim] Wood, 21, told police that thieves had ransacked his home in Seventh Street, Blackhall Colliery, and taken £500 worth of presents from under the tree, before throwing it to the floor and also taking his TV, microwave and electric fire.

[...]

Wood said: “I’m so sorry. I’m ashamed of what I’ve done.

“I did it because I thought people might donate Christmas presents and I would get some more for Abbey.

“The longer it went on, the more guilty I felt, especially using Abbey like that, and I wouldn’t want my little girl to be ashamed of me so I went to the police.

“I’m just so sorry.”

[Sunderland Echo]

'Yogi Bear' -- The Alternate Ending

The Captain is just straight-up lifting this from one of his favorite sites, TheAwl.com, without adding any value of his own. Really, nothing could add to this.

Warner Bros. is certain to take this down soon, so watch it while you can.



[TheAwl.com]

Bring Your Kids to Chernobyl!

As Mr. Burns would say, ... excellent!

KIEV, Ukraine – Want a better understanding of the world's worst nuclear disaster? Come tour the Chernobyl nuclear power plant.

Beginning next year, Ukraine plans to open up the sealed zone around the Chernobyl reactor to visitors who wish to learn more about the tragedy that occurred nearly a quarter of a century ago, the Emergency Situations Ministry said Monday.

[...]

Today, about 2,500 employees maintain the remains of the now-closed nuclear plant, working in shifts to minimize their exposure to radiation. Several hundred evacuees have returned to their villages in the area despite a government ban. A few firms now offer tours to the restricted area, but the government says those tours are illegal and their safety is not guaranteed.

Emergency Situations Ministry spokeswoman Yulia Yershova said experts are developing travel routes that will be both medically safe and informative for Ukrainians as well as foreign visitors. She did not give an exact date when the tours were expected to begin.

[Yahoo!]

Atheism Can Be Deadly

Sometimes God works in mysterious ways. Other times He's more straightforward and commands His followers to stab disbelievers to death.

A DISPUTE over the existence of God between four Russians drunk on a litre of pure alcohol resulted in the death of two of the drinking buddies.

The disagreement began over the weekend when the female house owner, her son, a male roommate and undisclosed male relative drank the liter of pure alcohol, "which they downed with snow," a police investigator told RIA Novosti.

"Soon after the drinking session, the suspect [the son] and the two other men got into a fight about the existence of God," the police official in the western Siberia region of Tomsk reported.

The son ended up attacking both men with a knife, killing them both, the report said. The suspect, who has a prior conviction record, faces life in prison if found guilty.

[Herald Sun]

Aussie Flight Has Crappy Ending

A pilot's cry of "oh shit" before crashing has never rung so true.

Veteran Australian pilot Ben Buckley was at the controls of a 1910 plane built by John Duigan, which made the first powered flight when he had an unwelcome close encounter with the manure.

He’d taken off okay from the Victorian town of Ballarat, but veered off the runway when he landed – straight into a 20 tonne pile of chicken manure.

He told ABC news that the event turned his day into a real stinker.

He said: ‘The council had shifted it to the edge of the runway and the aeroplane finished up in that.

‘Well there was a bit of give in it. I'm still a bit stiff and sore though, I can tell you.’

[Metro]

Lessons From The Great Beyond

Even though he's dead, Nixon is still speaking to us and whether we like it or not, he's still making sense. People knock Nixon but he really captures the spirit of this country better than any other President. You want to win? Cheat. Step on the next guy. Be nice to their face but keep your head on straight behind closed doors.

They call these "disparaging remarks" but really...just dead on analysis. Americans want to have it both ways and Nixon can do this for you, but Nixon also had an awesome sense of civic duty so he had the vision to TAPE his REAL sentiments in the hope this country would grow up enough to handle the truth. But apparently the New York Times (Jews) will still spin this against him.

It's funny but Nixon was a better friend to the Jews than the Jew he hired, Henry Kissinger! If you read the bottom of this it quotes Dr. Strangelove as saying Jews in the gas chambers are not an American concern. What a pal. If Kissinger was running the show they could have left Auschwitz open. Mind you, the idea was that you would ASK the Russians a QUESTION about letting the Jews out. Imagine what a powerhouse diplomatic effort that would have required, opening your mouth and asking. What a prick. At least when Nixon calls people names he gets it right.

Richard M. Nixon made disparaging remarks about Jews, blacks, Italian-Americans and Irish-Americans in a series of extended conversations with top aides and his personal secretary, recorded in the Oval Office 16 months before he resigned as president.

"The Jews have certain traits," he said. "The Irish have certain -- for example, the Irish can't drink. What you always have to remember with the Irish is they get mean. Virtually every Irish I've known gets mean when he drinks. Particularly the real Irish."

Nixon continued: "The Italians, of course, those people course don't have their heads screwed on tight. They are wonderful people, but," and his voice trailed off.

A moment later, Nixon returned to Jews: "The Jews are just a very aggressive and abrasive and obnoxious personality."

An indication of Nixon's complex relationship with Jews came the afternoon Golda Meir, the Israeli prime minister, came to visit on March 1, 1973. The tapes capture Meir offering warm and effusive thanks to Nixon for the way he had treated her and Israel.

But moments after she left, Nixon and Mr. Kissinger were brutally dismissive in response to requests that the United States press the Soviet Union to permit Jews to emigrate and escape persecution there.

"The emigration of Jews from the Soviet Union is not an objective of American foreign policy," Mr. Kissinger said. "And if they put Jews into gas chambers in the Soviet Union, it is not an American concern. Maybe a humanitarian concern."

"I know," Nixon responded. "We can't blow up the world because of it."

[New York Times]

"This Country Was Built on Racism"

So says the owner of this general store in Indiana, and the Captain really can't argue with that analysis.

This story is about a bunch of free enterprise hating, politically correct thugs who want to destroy a hard working, job creating, small businessman's freedom to sell bars of soap with nostalgic brand names such as "Darkie," "Kolored Kids," and "Coon Chicken." The good news is that many of Indiana's liberty loving citizens are steadfastly defending their neighbor's God-given right to profit on America's great heritage of cleanliness and racism.

Noblesville, Ind. — The controversy over soap with racist labels being sold at a Noblesville store continues. In addition to those who are offended by the store selling these items, there is also growing support for the vendor who has been ordered to take the soaps off the shelves or face eviction.

Are they just a light-hearted look at history or not? General Store owner Gary Dewester remains steadfast neither the soaps nor himself, are in any way racist.

After hearing about the soap, Carolyn Gentner bought two bars including one labeled "Kolored Kids."

"I don't think they're offensive, I think they're nostalgic," she told Fox59 News. "I believe if this is going to be an issue, we should be in Kroger for selling Aunt Jemima syrup."

Supporters tell us they want people to see the soap and Gary's store for what it is: trinkets of American History for sale.

Clay Hicks is a student at IU and knows the Dewesters personally. He spoke to Fox59 via Skype Thursday:

"They're good people and they've never shown any signs of racism before that any of us have seen," he said. "The soaps are antiques. He owns an antique store. If he had gone home and made the soaps and wrote racist things on them in his basement and then tried to sell them, that would be a different story but these are antiques."

[...]

Courtney Van Velse writes: "We live in a free country where we can buy and sell as we wish, if we took everything off the market that offended someone, we'd probably not have many things left!"

[...]

Gary says he's now sold out of the soaps. After hearing about the story, people have driven as far as two hours from Evansville and down from South Bend to buy. Gary said a black woman bought his last nine bars, calling the soap "funny" and "cute."

[...]

Fox59 spoke to two national experts Thursday on Black Americana and both tell me these kinds of soaps with these labels NEVER ever existed in our history. These aren't reproductions but what are called "fantasy items" printed purely for profit.

[Fox59.com] via [The Awl]

Keith Richards: Orchid Killer

Keith Richards has been poisoning himself for several hundred years now, but he'll probably live forever, if not longer. That doesn't mean he won't leave a trail of death and destruction in his selfish, toxic wake.

One living thing did not survive Keith Richards’ visit to the New York Public Library in late October - an orchid in the office of Cullman Center Deputy Director Marie d’Origny. While Keef was waiting ‘backstage’ in the center before the talk, he unexpectedly lit up a cigarette in Marie’s office, and grabbed the clay saucer underneath the orchid for a makeshift ash tray. He then asked for the window to be open, sending a chill through the office. Between the cold and the smoke, the little orchid never stood a chance. RIP, sweet flower.

[New York Public Library]

Smurfberries: The New Kiddie Crack

Bushels of these virtual fruits are costing parents a bundle.

Children as young as four are going on spending sprees with their parents’ credit cards while playing virtual games on iPhones and other Apple gadgets.

Youngsters are playing free-to-download apps such as The Smurfs’ and then racking up bills of up to £100 buying items such as ‘Smurfberries’.

Meanwhile their parents are unaware of their sons and daughters’ wallet-busting habits until they receive their credit card bills.

California's Kelly Rummelhart’s four-year-old son was using her iPad to play the game and racked up $66.88 (£42) in charges without knowing what he was doing.

In this case, her son bought one bushel and 11 buckets of Smurfberries, tokens that speed up gameplay.

[...]

Capcom Entertainment, the publisher of The Smurfs' Village, says inadvertent purchases by children are "lamentable."

[...]

Capcom spokesman Michael Larson says "Smurfs" is no different from other games in this regard, and the bulk purchasing option is useful to adult "power players."

It's quite likely that most of the money pulled in by these games comes from addicted adults who want to quickly build their Smurf villages, bakeries, zoos and zombie farms. But there's a loophole in the in-app purchase process that children stick their fingers through.

[...]

Andrew Butterworth of Ontario, Canada was well aware of how in-app purchases work and of the password-free period.

[...]

"[My son] came to me all proud and said he'd figured out a way to get all these Smurfberries," Mr Butterworth says.

"And as soon as I saw the Smurfberries, I knew that he'd purchased them using my credit card. “I was amazed that he'd figured out a way to do it, because I was sure that he would have needed my password."

He had last entered his password on the iPod four or five hours earlier, he said. His son's shopping spree cost $140 (£88).

Jesus. Addicted adults and children are spending real money building fake "Smurf villages, bakeries, zoos and zombie farms." Kids and parents alike were far better off in the good old days of simply rotting their brains away watching TV.

[Daily Mail]

Taiwanese Underground

It's hard to imagine anything possibly going wrong with this idea.

Medical students in Taiwan are being buried alive in coffins - to help them appreciate the value of life.

Teenagers at Rende Medical College are being given the unusual lessons which tutors say should give them an insight into death.

The students have to write a will, dress in a funeral shroud and then climb into a coffin while they are buried under floorboards before they are released.

Professor Qiu Daneng explained: "Although it's just 10 minutes, the effect is equal to real death."

"Equal to real death," eh? Good to know. The Captain looks forward to being released from his coffin 10 minutes after he's buried.

[Orange News]

O Christmas Weed

The Captain is certain that Krampus is somehow behind this.

A six-foot marijuana plant decorated as a Christmas tree was confiscated from the home of "an old hippie," who is now facing a drug possession charge, German police said Wednesday.

In a tongue-in-cheek statement titled "All you need is love or how a hippie celebrates Christmas," police in the western city of Koblenz said they discovered the giant plant in the living room of the suspect.

"The two-meter-tall marijuana plant had been put in a Christmas tree stand and decorated with a string of lights," the police said. "When asked, the hashish fan told the perplexed officers that he had intended to add more decorations to the 'tree' and place the presents under it, according to tradition."

Police seized the plant and another 5.3 ounces (150 grams) of marijuana found in the apartment.

[New York Post]

Imagine What It Does To Us All?

This is amazing, and it applies to babies that watch TV for only 60 minutes a day? How many babies do YOU know who are watching less TV than that? I don't know ANY! All the babies I know are loading up on TV. The REAL impact of this is probably devastating. A nation of Einsteins reduced to dribbling fools.

Plus, if you extrapolate this information, a typical grownup, watching a full day of TV, the adult portion of six to eight hours...forget about it! Nothing left. Jello.

My favorite part is no, you can't count on "Sesame Street" to help. The babies may as well be watching porn. But isn't this just like smoking? You know it's bad and you're going to do it anyway. If your baby is sitting there, you know you are going to watch the game, or "Oprah" or whatever. You won't shut it off, even though you know you are stifling the next Alexander Graham Bell. Because...YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT SHE'S GOING TO DO TO LOSE WEIGHT NOW...AFTER ALL THIS TIME WHEN NOTHING HAS WORKED!

Babies who watch TV are more likely to have delayed cognitive development and language at 14 months, especially if they're watching programs intended for adults and older children. We probably knew that 24 and Grey's Anatomy don't really qualify as educational content, but it's surprising that TV-watching made a difference at such a tender age.

Babies who watched 60 minutes of TV daily had developmental scores one-third lower at 14 months than babies who weren't watching that much TV. Though their developmental scores were still in the normal range, the discrepancy may be due to the fact that when kids and parents are watching TV, they're missing out on talking, playing, and interactions that are essential to learning and development.

But what about "good" TV, like Sesame Street? The researchers didn't find any pluses or minuses when compared to non-educational programs designed for small children, like SpongeBob SquarePants

.

[US News]